Forum: Dying alone is not always a bad death or symptom of societal neglect
https://www.straitstimes.com/opinion/forum/forum-dying-alone-is-not-always-a-bad-death-or-symptom-of-societal-neglect
2022-12-01
I refer to the article, “No one should die alone, and be left undiscovered for weeks” (Nov 28). Mr Sng Hock Lin urged that as a society, we must do more to promote social connectedness among our citizens, especially for the elderly living in one- or two-person households, and thereby reduce the incidence rate of our elderly dying alone. As he puts it, “Singapore needs to step up now”.
Within the context of a rapidly ageing society as well as the proliferation of smaller nuclear families, I would like to offer a different view.
Dying alone is typically viewed either as an outcome of anti-social behaviour, or the result of some form of family, community or societal neglect. The idea that some people may be exercising agency at the end of life and that they do not want attention from social services, or the wider community, receives little or no consideration.
News reports of our elderly dying alone are also used to ask questions about the nature of contemporary society and the way social relationships have changed, usually in a negative manner.
In the social discourse about lonely deaths, we should consider the notion that some of our elderly are exercising their agency and are actively acting upon the choices they have made.
We must be careful not to overtly prescribe how members of our society ought to behave.
Dying alone is not always a bad death or symptom of a larger societal malaise. It may have been the best death that they could render themselves amid their circumstances and our changing demographic contexts.
In fact, what is more of a tragedy than elderly dying alone is the social death experienced by those who were forgotten and invisible to society long before they were found dead. Lonely deaths are merely a manifestation of the many social deaths in our midst.
Dying alone should not be seen as just a negative societal development. It is certainly more than a mere social or public health issue.
It is a public policy issue that requires our society to comprehensively review our views and attitudes towards dying, death, issues of mortality and our people’s pre- and post-funerary arrangements.
Bernard Chen Jiaxi
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