Tuesday, October 31, 2023

十月美景

31-10-2023 -- 十月的最后一天

对数码银行存顾虑

对数码银行存顾虑

*“难道我们都要多买一部手机,完全不下载任何银行应用,才是比较安全的做法吗?”*

https://www.zaobao.com.sg/forum/talk/story20231031-1446723

2023-10-31

黄新立


最近在报章上多次读到有关数码银行服务发生故障的新闻,再次引发我对使用数码银行的一些疑问。

目前在本地银行开设户头,银行已不再发出实体存折,不管有多少个银行户头,全部都会显现在手机的银行应用上。

我曾问过银行职员,可不可以不要将所有的户头信息都显示出来,但她说不可以。这就产生问题了。我们每次出国旅游时,必然会携带手机,这不就如同将所有的“财产”都带在身上。若不幸被歹徒劫持,被迫要打开手机里的数码银行户头,歹徒就能清楚看到我们户头里有多少钱,将之洗劫一空。

我不知这算不算杞人忧天,有句老话说“财不可露眼”,手机里的银行应用却偏偏反其道而行,没有任何灵活性,让我们的钱财尽数露眼。这很可能引起更严重的后果。若真的发生这类事件,不知银行方面有没有任何责任或应变对策呢?

难道我们都要多买一部手机,完全不下载任何银行应用,才是比较安全的做法吗?

Concerns about digital banking对数码银行存顾虑

Concerns about digital banking
对数码银行存顾虑

Google translation 

*"Is it safer for us all to buy an extra mobile phone and not download any banking apps at all?"*


2023-10-31

By Huang Xinli


Recently, I have read several times in the newspapers about the failure of digital banking services, which once again raised some questions in me about using digital banking.

Currently, when you open an account in a local bank, the bank no longer issues physical passbooks. No matter how many bank accounts you have, they will all be displayed on the mobile banking application.

I once asked the bank clerk if I could not display all the account information, but she said no. This creates a problem. Every time we travel abroad, we inevitably carry our mobile phones with us. Isn't this just like taking all our "properties" with us? If unfortunately we are hijacked by criminals and forced to open the digital bank account on our mobile phone, the criminals can clearly see how much money we have in our account and rob it.

I don’t know if this is unfounded worry. There is an old saying that “money should not be visible to the eye.” However, banking applications on mobile phones do exactly the opposite. They do not have any flexibility and make all our money visible. This is likely to cause more serious consequences. If such an incident does occur, does the bank have any responsibilities or contingency measures?

Is it safer for us all to buy an extra mobile phone and not download any banking apps at all?


https://www.zaobao.com.sg/forum/talk/story20231031-1446723

什麼是 子女?

转发

什麼是 子女?

很有意思的說明

你在他出生證明上簽個字
他在你死亡證明上簽個字

生他的時候你笑得合不攏嘴
你走的時候他哭的撕心裂肺

你點頭醫生才能剖腹生產
他點頭醫生才能給你拔管

你給他上幼稚園   
他給你送安養院

你給他腳踏車   
他給你推輪椅

多年前你把他從醫院抱著回家
多年後他把你從火葬場捧回家

你給他買個大房子
他給你買個小罐子

你給他拍照片
他給你捧照片

他要錢你賺給他花
你要錢他燒給你花                                                   
你幫他報戶口
他幫你除戶口    

這就是 子 女💕

The Omnibox (Chrome combines *address bar and search bar* into one bar, known as the *Omnibox*.)

The Omnibox
(Chrome combines *address bar and search bar* into one bar, known as the *Omnibox*.)

-------

Some browsers use an *address bar* for navigating to websites and a *search bar* for conducting web searches. Google *Chrome combines these two elements into one bar, known as the Omnibox*. By integrating Google's search technology, the Omnibox offers suggestions for websites or potential web searches as you type, which makes navigating the Web faster and easier.

https://edu.gcfglobal.org/en/chrome/browsing-in-chrome/1/

Monday, October 30, 2023

食客可自备折纸盒

食客可自备折纸盒


https://www.zaobao.com.sg/forum/talk/story20231030-1446545

2023-10-30

汪紫馨


读了《联合早报·交流站》10月26日刊登的洪定贤读者投函《考虑提供免费小盒子装残渣》的意见,我认为要有关当局提供免费小盒子是不太可能的事,因为这牵涉错综复杂的管理程序。到时这笔费用要归谁?塑料袋收费五分钱都已引起怨言。

与其等待当局提供,倒不如食客自己带。我们只要花点时间自己折纸盒,也不必去买。很多广告传单、过期杂志,都可使用,又可赋予这些只会被丢弃的纸张新生命,折成盒子来装骨头或残渣,确保餐桌干净又环保。

和购物环保袋一样,我的包包都会放上几个备用。我也多做一些送给朋友,他们也觉得很实用,要我教她们如何折纸盒。家里宴客和出外用餐都很好用。我在餐馆使用时,服务员也很感激与赞赏,让他们收拾桌面时更方便。

这只是举手之劳,大家都可以自己做,可上网搜索折纸盒视频,即刻行动。

全国眼科中心服务待改善

全国眼科中心服务待改善
https://www.zaobao.com.sg/forum/talk/story20231030-1446543

2023-10-30

吴俊刚


我对新加坡全国眼科中心(SNEC)可说是敬而远之。事缘好些年前因为右眼出现飞蚊症,被转介到中心,并预约了一个日期和时间到中心的分部看诊。当天依约前往,不料等了近三个小时还没轮到,眼看就要中午,病人几乎都走了,查问之下,才发觉原来排号被遗漏了。后来才安排补上,总算看了医生,但却说没药医,也没药拿,只好回家,飞蚊症后来不知怎地也自动消失了,从此和眼科中心绝缘。

直到最近,发觉眼镜似乎焦距不好,到眼镜店想重配一副,验光师仔细检测后得出结论,不是眼镜问题,恐怕是患上白内障之类的问题,建议去找眼科医生。

日前,因病到勿洛综合诊疗所看诊,于是请医生也代为写一封转介信,然后回家等消息,说是会收到手机短信告知看诊日期和时间。第二天,儿子发来短信,说是收到眼科中心的短信通知看诊日期。我查看自己的手机,并无此信息,明显是眼科中心摆乌龙了。还没看医生,就已对中心的行政失去信心。后来看到预约看诊的日期,竟然是排到明年4月,换句话说,要等上整整半年。

不久前,一位老友发现看东西出现小黑影,连忙到眼科中心看诊,被告知要等很久,如果要快的话,可以付钱,也就是说不能享受津贴。因为担心情况恶化,他决定付钱,果然付了钱,大约三天后就安排看了医生,紧接着也安排动了相关手术。难道享受政府津贴就要付出代价吗?

Sunday, October 29, 2023

说法识法 备好书证与人证 避免遗嘱变“疑嘱”

【说法识法】备好书证与人证 避免遗嘱变“疑嘱”

订户
赠阅文章
林美莉律师:如果分配给受益人的遗产不平等,最好在遗嘱上明说,免除日后受益人因分配不均而引发纠纷。(Chevalier Law提供)
林美莉律师:如果分配给受益人的遗产不平等,最好在遗嘱上明说,免除日后受益人因分配不均而引发纠纷。(Chevalier Law提供)

字体大小:

几年前,寡妇晓冰找律师立好遗嘱,把遗产均分给两名单身子女。如今,她的遗产规划有变,因女儿闪婚,准备跟洋女婿移居瑞士,她想留多一些给儿子。为了省律师费,晓冰自行修改遗嘱,找两个亲友当见证人。但好友提醒她,遗嘱未经律师过目,若有任何疏漏,日后可能变成无效,给家人增添麻烦。遗嘱在什么情况下会失效?遗嘱若遗失或烧毁,执行人该怎么做?本期《说法识法》邀请四名律师解说遗嘱种种注意事项,以及如何预防遗嘱被质疑。

要避免遗嘱的合法性日后受质疑,遗嘱人制定遗嘱前,最好先获取证明心智健全的医疗报告,并让律师或医生担任遗嘱的见证人。

林美莉律师(Chevalier Law LLC)说,如果遗嘱受质疑,律师或医生见证人将能证明遗嘱人制定遗嘱时的心智能力正常,不受任何胁迫或不当影响。

林美莉说,遗嘱须按照《遗嘱法令》的规定签署,遗嘱人须年满21岁;立遗嘱前,须确保先前的遗嘱或附件都已撤销。

“多数人不熟悉的条规是,遗嘱人必须在两个证人在场下签署遗嘱,见证人也必须签署,而且不能是受益人或受益人的配偶,否则遗赠将被视为无效。 ”

她指出,律师会要求遗嘱人再三检查遗嘱内容是否已涵盖、处置好所有资产,因为亲友可能对遗嘱人的资产是否得到适当处置提出质疑,例如联名形式拥有的银行账户或房地产。

以房地产来说,房地产可以是以联权共有(joint tenancy)或分权共有(tenancy-in-common)。

“联权共有”是指两人或多人共同拥有房地产的业权,各人权益相同,一人死后,其业权归余下尚存者,意味着有立遗嘱或无遗嘱,受益人或继承人都将无法获享业权。

“分权共有”则指两人或多人按均等或不均等的份额,各自拥有业权,一人死后,不论有没有遗嘱,其业权都归受益人或继承人。

“除非联权共有人打算死后,把业权归给另外活着的联权共有人,不然在立遗嘱之前,就必须确保所有联权共有的房地产都已终止,也就是转成分权共有的形式,才能通过遗嘱分配。”

李一阳律师:要避免遗嘱日后受质疑,起草遗嘱和见证遗嘱的签订都应咨询法律专业人士,因为律师会确保一切手续都遵守遗嘱法令的规定,保证遗嘱的有效性。(信约律师事务所提供)

公积金存款若生前没提名 将根据无遗嘱继承法处置

另外,公积金存款是根据提名而非遗嘱分配。如果生前没提名,公积金存款将根据无遗嘱继承法处置。

信约律师事务所(Covenant Chambers LLC)执行董事李一阳律师和副董事黄惠恩律师指出,要避免遗嘱日后受质疑,起草遗嘱和见证遗嘱的签订都应咨询法律专业人士,因为律师会确保一切手续都遵守遗嘱法令的规定,保证遗嘱的有效性。

“律师也会详记草拟遗嘱时的讨论。遗嘱若受质疑,这样的笔记将是重要证据,因为记录了起草过程,遗嘱人当时的明确意愿和立遗嘱的能力。”

专家:将医疗报告纳入遗嘱 有助证明遗嘱人有心智能力

何坚安律师(NLC Law Asia LLC)说,为了减少可能出现有人质疑立遗嘱人“欠缺心智能力”的争议,遗嘱人应考虑将医疗报告纳入遗嘱,证明他有能力制定遗嘱和处置财产。

“这份医疗报告的签发日期,最好与签立遗嘱的日期相去不远,一旦引发遗嘱人是否有心智能力的异议,就能成为提供同时期(contemporaneous)和客观的证据。”

他指出,在准备、草拟和执行遗嘱过程中,遗嘱人应寻求法律意见和独立证人的协助。

“遗嘱人应尽可能单独指示律师,不应让另一人,尤其是指定受益人,向律师发指示。”

何坚安律师:为了减少可能出现有人质疑立遗嘱人“欠缺心智能力”的争议,遗嘱人应考虑将医疗报告纳入遗嘱,证明他有能力制定遗嘱和处置财产。(NLC Law Asia提供)

遗嘱的内容应简单扼要,以遗嘱人最熟悉的语言念出,再逐行逐字给他解释,确保他明白内容,然后在两位见证人面前签订。

他提醒,如果要排除某些人为受益人,比如以为会分获遗产的配偶或子女,遗嘱人最好在遗嘱中作出声明加以解释,“他日遗嘱受质疑,声明可供法院考虑” 。

林美莉也提醒,遗嘱其实是书面的死亡愿望单,列明你要受益人或信托人在你离世后应当享有或处理的事。

“如果分配给A和B的遗产不平等,最好在遗嘱上明说,比如A所得比B少,是因为你生前给A的胜过给B的。如此一来,将能免除日后受益人因分配不均引发的纠纷。”

遗嘱有效性被质疑四情况

信约律师事务所的李一阳和黄惠恩律师,整理以下遗嘱有效性被质疑的几个情况:

■遗嘱造假

遗嘱人须了解遗嘱内容,在签订时遗嘱内容须反映他的真实意愿,这样的遗嘱才算有效。

若通过欺诈手段制定遗嘱,例如遗嘱人在不知内容的情况下被骗签署,或遗嘱造假,遗嘱将被撤销。

■遗嘱人缺乏心智能力

立遗嘱的能力( testamentary capacity )是指理解遗嘱效力的能力,而法律对遗嘱能力的要求如下:

  • 了解立遗嘱的目的和后果
  • 知道要处置的财产范围
  • 知道受益人是谁,并接受他们索取财产的权利
  • 立遗嘱不具任何异常心理状态

李一阳和黄惠恩说,如果遗嘱人有精神问题,不代表他就没有能力制定遗嘱。

“如果在立遗嘱之前就有精神疾病(比如失智症),导致他欠缺制定遗嘱的能力,是可以推定遗嘱人在立遗嘱时还是欠缺立遗嘱的能力。

“不过,若能证明制定遗嘱时头脑尚有清醒的片刻,这个推定可以被推翻。”

他们举徐妙玲就母亲遗嘱的合法性起诉妹妹徐嘉玲的案例(Chee Mu Lin Muriel v Chee Ka Lin Caroline)说,上诉庭确认遗嘱人在立遗嘱时患有早期失智症,但这一事实不意味着她在关键时间欠缺立遗嘱的能力,“遗嘱人在执行遗嘱时,可能是清醒、并且有能力立遗嘱”。

■受不当影响

不当影响意味着遗嘱人的独立性受严重损害,被迫制定不想制定的遗嘱。

■没遵照遗嘱规格

没遵守以下任何规定,遗嘱可能视为无效。

  • 须采用书面形式
  • 须年满21岁
  • 须在遗嘱下面签署
  • 遗嘱人的签名必须有至少两人见证,而见证人必须在遗嘱人在场下签署遗嘱
  • 两名主要见证人不能是遗嘱受益人或受益人的配偶

两律师最后提醒,遗嘱验证书一旦签发,任何异议必须在签发后的六个月内提出。

如果期限后才提出异议,就必须向法院解释为什么无法在六个月内提出异议,法院将酌情考虑,看是否允许异议方索赔。

黄惠恩律师:遗嘱被毁坏或损坏,只要不是故意销毁或遗嘱人本身同意销毁,法院还是可以根据副本或草稿发出遗嘱认证,但申请人须提出充分证据,证明副本或草稿的内容跟原件一样。(信约律师事务所提供)

遗嘱遗失或受损 是否被视为撤销?

遗嘱遗失、烧毁或损毁,如何是好?

林美莉律师说,原遗嘱不会立即被视为撤销。如果找得到遗嘱副本或草稿,而且可以提供让法院满意的解释,包括为何无法出示正本,以及副本或草稿与被毁的遗嘱内容相同,法院仍然可发出遗嘱认证书。

谈到相关证据,她举例说,遗嘱人曾电邮某人,谈论已立好遗嘱,并将遗嘱附加到电邮中。起草遗嘱的律师也可以作证,确认副本或草稿与原件的条款相同。

遗产若无副本或草稿 按无遗嘱继承法分配

林美莉说,若找不到副本或草稿,就当无遗嘱论,遗产按照无遗嘱继承法分配。

李一阳律师和黄惠恩律师说,如果遗嘱毁坏或损坏,只要不是故意被销毁或遗嘱人本身同意销毁,法院还是可以根据副本或草稿发出遗嘱认证,但申请人必须提出充分的证据,证明副本或草稿的内容跟原件一样。

LIKE我们的官方脸书网页以获取更多新信息

Vitamin Deficiencies of Older Adults

https://www.mountsinai.org/health-library/report/vitamins

Older Adults

Almost one-third of older people do not get enough of certain vitamins and important minerals. Often their dietary habits slip and they fail to regularly eat balanced meals. In addition, older adults are more likely to take medications that prevent the absorption of certain vitamins.

Common vitamin deficiencies in older people include the following:

Older people, particularly if they are not exposed to sunlight, may be deficient in vitamin D. Older adults should get at least 800 IU (20 mcg) of vitamin D a day. People who are obese, or who have osteoporosis, limited sun exposure, or poor nutrient absorption may need to increase their intake to as much as 2,000 IU per day.
Seniors also may have low levels of important B vitamins. Older adults with symptoms of dementia should be tested for a B12 deficiency.
Seniors need to use caution when taking vitamin supplements. Because metabolism slows with age, it takes the liver longer to remove vitamins from the body. Therefore, the effect of some vitamin supplements may be intensified in older adults. For example, a dose of vitamin A that might be harmless in a younger adult could be toxic in an older person.

Multivitamin

You may address nutritional deficiencies with the following supplements:

A multivitamin daily, containing the antioxidant vitamins A, C, E, D, the B-complex vitamins, and trace minerals, such as magnesium, calcium, zinc, and selenium.

Information source:
https://www.mountsinai.org/health-library/condition/pancreatitis#:~:text=A%20multivitamin%20daily%2C%20containing%20the,reduce%20inflammation%20and%20improve%20immunity.

- 不空为真空:人民日报的这段话,打通了我的任督二脉:没钱的羡慕有钱的,有... - 今日头条https://m.toutiao.com/is/idv2atfa/

人民日报的这段话,打通了我的任督二脉:没钱的羡慕有钱的,有钱的羡慕没病的,有病的羡慕有命的,人活着的时候,什么都想拥有,当死神来临的时候,只想活着,都以为别人的世界很美好,殊不知别人也在羡慕着你的生活,其实生活本就是一日三餐,所以,记得感恩和珍惜你所拥有的一切。
《增广贤文icon》里说的更贴切:
别人骑马我骑驴,
仔细思量我不如,
等我回头看,还有挑脚汉。

人生就是这样,即便你再落魄,再潦倒,再受到病痛折磨与不公的待遇,但一定还有人比你更惨!
想到这里,你一定会有所慰籍,尽管有自欺欺人的嫌疑。
但现实就是这样,如果整天像祥林嫂一样戚戚不可终日,不但于事无补,还会让你更痛苦。
所以《心经》才说:观自在菩萨,行深般若波罗蜜多时,照见五蕴皆空,度一切苦厄。

人的一生就是修炼的过程,不把苦当苦,苦就会慢慢转化。
把苦当成苦,苦就会愈加放大,最终无限制自我折磨。
其实可以问一下自己,百年三万六千日,你还有多少日子?还能看多少个黄昏与日落?还能与父母一起吃多少次饭?还能陪儿女多久?

人生短暂,当下就是一切,现在就是人生!

人生

人民日报的这段话,打通了我的任督二脉:没钱的羡慕有钱的,有钱的羡慕没病的,有病的羡慕有命的,人活着的时候,什么都想拥有,当死神来临的时候,只想活着,都以为别人的世界很美好,殊不知别人也在羡慕着你的生活,其实生活本就是一日三餐,所以,记得感恩和珍惜你所拥有的一切。
《增广贤文icon》里说的更贴切:
别人骑马我骑驴,
仔细思量我不如,
等我回头看,还有挑脚汉。

人生就是这样,即便你再落魄,再潦倒,再受到病痛折磨与不公的待遇,但一定还有人比你更惨!
想到这里,你一定会有所慰籍,尽管有自欺欺人的嫌疑。
但现实就是这样,如果整天像祥林嫂一样戚戚不可终日,不但于事无补,还会让你更痛苦。
所以《心经》才说:观自在菩萨,行深般若波罗蜜多时,照见五蕴皆空,度一切苦厄。

人的一生就是修炼的过程,不把苦当苦,苦就会慢慢转化。
把苦当成苦,苦就会愈加放大,最终无限制自我折磨。
其实可以问一下自己,百年三万六千日,你还有多少日子?还能看多少个黄昏与日落?还能与父母一起吃多少次饭?还能陪儿女多久?

人生短暂,当下就是一切,现在就是人生!

Saturday, October 28, 2023

Dementia: My father didn’t want to live if he had dementia. But then he had it. By Sandeep Jauhar.

My monthly weight monitoring results 28 May 2007 to 28 October 2023 with 97.461% of BMI being healthy


My monthly weight monitoring results 
--28 May 2007 to 28 October 2023--
with 97.461% of BMI being healthy 


As of 2023-10-28, 

Total number of My Monthly Weight monitored was 197 (100%)

The no. of times my healthy BMI between 18.5 and 22.9 was 192 (97.461%)

The no. of times my unhealthy BMI equal or more than 23.000 was 5 (2.539%)


My 16-year plus Weight Management Records from 2007-05-28 to 2023-10-28 (by Calorie Restriction, i.e. Dietary Energy Restriction):


23-10-2023 重阳节
My 16-year plus Weight Management Records from 2007-05-28 to 2023-10-28 (by Calorie Restriction, i.e. Dietary Energy Restriction):

Note: According to the Singapore Health Promotion Board, a Healthy BMI is greater than18.5 and less than 23.0. A BMI less than 18.5 would mean that the individual is at risk of nutrition deficiency diseases and osteoporosis. 

A BMI equal or greater than 23.0 would mean that the individual is at risk of obesity-related diseases. (Ref: DD-Md2022J28)

As of 2023-10-28,

Note: ### indicates BMI = 23 or > 23

Total number of Monthly Weight monitored was 197 (100%)

The no. of times my healthy BMI between 18.5 and 22.9 was 192 (97.461%)

The no. of times my unhealthy BMI equal or more than 23.000 was 5 (2.539%)

=======================

2007

2007-05-28 morning, my weight = 65.0 kg, BMI = 23.588###

2007-06-28 morning, my weight = 61.0 kg, BMI = 22.136

2007-07-28 morning, my weight = 59.0 kg, BMI = 21.410

2007-08-28 morning, my weight = 58.7 kg, BMI = 21.302

2007-09-28 morning, my weight = 57.5 kg, BMI = 20.866

2007-10-28 morning, my weight = 57.5 kg, BMI = 20.866

2007-11-28 morning, my weight = 56.2 kg, BMI = 20.394

2007-12-28 morning, my weight = 55.5 kg, BMI = 20.140

2008

2008-01-28 morning, my weight = 54.8 kg, BMI = 19.886

2008-02-28 morning, my weight = 54.8 kg, BMI = 19.886

2008-03-28 morning, my weight = 54.5 kg, BMI = 19.777

2008-04-28 morning, my weight = 54.4 kg, BMI = 19.741

2008-05-28 morning, my weight = 54.1 kg, BMI = 19.632

2008-06-28 morning, my weight = 54.6 kg, BMI = 19.814

2008-07-28 morning, my weight = 54.5 kg, BMI = 19.777

2008-08-28 morning, my weight = 54.3 kg, BMI = 19.705

2008-09-28 morning, my weight = 54.9 kg, BMI = 19.923

2008-10-28 morning, my weight = 55.3 kg, BMI = 20.068

2008-11-28 morning, my weight = 54.5 kg, BMI = 19.777

2008-12-28 morning, my weight = 55.6 kg, BMI = 20.177

2009

2009-01-28 morning, my weight = 54.8 kg, BMI = 19.886

2009-02-28 morning, my weight = 55.9 kg, BMI = 20.285

2009-03-28 morning, my weight = 54.8 kg, BMI = 19.886

2009-04-28 morning, my weight = 55.3 kg, BMI = 20.068

2009-05-28 morning, my weight = 55.4 kg, BMI = 20.104.

2009-06-28 morning, my weight = 55.2 kg, BMI = 20.031

2009-07-28 morning, my weight = 55.1 kg, BMI = 19.995

2009-08-28 morning, my weight = 55.2 kg, BMI = 20.031

2009-09-28 morning, my weight = 56.3 kg, BMI = 20.431

2009-10-28 morning, my weight = 55.8 kg, BMI = 20.249

2009-11-28 morning, my weight = 56.2 kg, BMI = 20.394

2009-12-28 morning, my weight = 56.1 kg, BMI = 20.358

2010

2010-01-28 morning, my weight = 55.6 kg, BMI = 20.177

2010-02-28 morning, my weight = 56.5 kg, BMI = 20.503

2010-03-28 morning, my weight = 56.4 kg, BMI = 20.467

2010-04-28 morning, my weight = 55.7 kg, BMI = 20.213

2010-05-28 morning, my weight = 55.1 kg, BMI = 19.995

2010-06-28 morning, my weight = 56.4 kg, BMI = 20.467

2010-07-28 morning, my weight = 55.5 kg, BMI = 20.140

2010-08-28 morning, my weight = 55.8 kg, BMI = 20.249

2010-09-28 morning, my weight = 55.8 kg, BMI = 20.249

2010-10-28 morning, my weight = 55.4 kg, BMI = 20.104

2010-11-28 morning, my weight = 55.6 kg, BMI = 20.177

2010-12-28 morning, my weight = 55.5 kg, BMI = 20.140

2011

2011-01-28 morning, my weight = 55.4 kg, BMI = 20.104

2011-02-28 morning, my weight = 56.5 kg, BMI = 20.503

2011-03-28 morning, my weight = 55.6 kg, BMI = 20.177

2011-04-28 morning, my weight = 55.7 kg, BMI = 20.213

2011-05-28 morning, my weight = 55.6 kg, BMI = 20.177

2011-06-28 morning, my weight = 56.3 kg, BMI = 20.431

2011-07-28 morning, my weight = 56.5 kg, BMI = 20.503

2011-08-28 morning, my weight = 56.9 kg, BMI = 20.649

2011-09-28 morning, my weight = 56.2 kg, BMI = 20.394

2011-10-28 morning, my weight = 56.8 kg, BMI = 20.613

2011-11-28 morning, my weight = 59.0 kg, BMI = 21.410

2011-12-28 morning, my weight = 60.3 kg, BMI = 21.882

2012

2012-01-28 morning, my weight = 61.5 kg, BMI = 22.318

2012-02-28 morning, my weight = 62.7 kg, BMI = 22.753

2012-03-28 morning, my weight = 62.5 kg, BMI = 22.681

2012-04-28 morning, my weight = 61.3 kg, BMI = 22.246

2012-05-28 morning, my weight = 60.7 kg, BMI = 22.028

2012-06-28 morning, my weight = 60.6 kg, BMI = 21.992

2012-07-28 morning, my weight = 61.2 kg, BMI = 22.209

2012-08-28 morning, my weight = 60.8 kg, BMI = 22.064

2012-09-28 morning, my weight = 61.5 kg, BMI = 22.318**

2012-10-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg, BMI = 22.608

2012-11-28 morning, my weight = 63.4 kg, BMI = 23.008###

2012-12-28 morning, my weight = 62.9 kg, BMI = 22.826

2013

2013-01-28 morning, my weight = 63.0 kg, BMI = 22.863

2013-02-28 morning, my weight = 62.1 kg, BMI = 22.536

2013-03-28 morning, my weight = 61.5 kg, BMI = 22.318

2013-04-28 morning, my weight = 63.1 kg, BMI = 22.899****

2013-05-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg, BMI = 22.608

2013-06-28 morning, my weight = 62.2 kg, BMI = 22.572

2013-07-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg, BMI = 22.645

2013-08-28 morning, my weight = 62.6 kg BMI = 22.717

2013-09-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg BMI = 22.645**

2013-10-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg BMI = 22.609

2013-11-28 morning, my weight = 63.1 kg BMI = 22.899

2013-12-28 morning, my weight = 64.4 kg BMI = 23.371###

2014

2014-01-28 morning, my weight = 63.6 kg, BMI = 23.080###

2014-02-28 morning, my weight = 63.3 kg, BMI = 22.971

2014-03-28 morning, my weight = 62.7 kg, BMI = 22.753

2014-04-28 morning, my weight = 62.7 kg, BMI = 22.753

2014-05-28 morning, my weight = 62.9 kg, BMI = 22.826

2014-06-28 morning, my weight = 63.1 kg BMI = 22.899

2014-07-28 morning, my weight = 62.7 kg, BMI = 22.753

2014-08-28 morning, my weight = 62.2 kg, BMI = 22.572

2014-09-28 morning, my weight = 61.2 kg, BMI = 22.209

2014-10-28 morning, my weight = 61.4 kg, BMI = 22.282

2014-11-28 morning, my weight = 60.2 kg, BMI = 21.846

2014-12-28 morning, my weight = 60.8 kg, BMI = 22.064

2015

2015-01-28 morning, my weight = 61.3 kg, BMI = 22.246

2015-02-28 morning, my weight = 61.8 kg, BMI = 22.427

2015-03-28 morning, my weight = 61.8 kg, BMI = 22.427

2015-04-28 morning, my weight = 62,5. kg, BMI = 22.681

2015-05-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg, BMI = 22.645

2015-06-28 morning, my weight = 63.6 kg, BMI = 23.080###

2015-07-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg BMI = 22.609

2015-08-28 morning, my weight = 62.2 kg, BMI = 22.572

2015-09-28 morning, my weight = 63.0 kg, BMI = 22.863

2015-10-28 morning, my weight = 63.2 kg, BMI = 22.935

2015-11-28 morning, my weight = 62.6 kg, BMI = 22.717

2015-12-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg BMI = 22.609

2016

2016-01-28 morning, my weight = 63.0 kg, BMI = 22.863

2016-02-28 morning, my weight = 62.8 kg, BMI = 22.790

2016-03-28 morning, my weight = 62.0 kg, BMI = 22.499

2016-04-28 morning, my weight = 62.0 kg, BMI = 22.499

2016-05-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg, BMI = 22.645

2016-06-28 morning, my weight = 62.1 kg, BMI = 22.536

2016-07-28 morning, my weight = 62.2 kg, BMI = 22.572

2016-08-28 morning, my weight = 62.6 kg, BMI = 22.717

2016-09-28 morning, my weight = 62.8 kg, BMI = 22.790

2016-10-28 morning, my weight = 62,5. kg, BMI = 22.681

2016-11-28 morning, my weight = 62.1 kg, BMI = 22.536

2016-12-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg, BMI = 22.608

2017

2017-01-28 morning, my weight = 62.9 kg, BMI = 22.826

2017-02-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg, BMI = 22.644

2017-03-28 morning, my weight = 62.8 kg, BMI = 22.789

2017-04-28 morning, my weight = 62.3 kg, BMI = 22.609

2017-05-28 morning, my weight = 62.2 kg, BMI = 22.572

2017-06-28 morning, my weight = 62.6 kg, BMI = 22.717

2017-07-28 morning, my weight = 62.4 kg, BMI = 22.645

2017-08-28 morning, my weight = 61.9 kg, BMI = 22.463

2017-09-28 morning, my weight = 62.0 kg, BMI = 22.499

2017-10-28 morning, my weight = 62.0 kg, BMI = 22.499

2017-11-28 morning, my weight = 61.5 kg, BMI = 22.318

2017-12-28 morning, my weight = 61.5 kg, BMI = 22.318

2018

My Weight 2018-01-28 0934 hr 61.0 kg BMI 22.136

My Weight 2018-02-28 0915 hr 60.7 kg BMI 22.027

My Weight 2018-03-28 0620 hr 61.0 kg BMI 22.136

My Weight 2018-04-28 1005 hr 61.7 kg BMI 22.390

My Weight 2018-05-28 0856 hr 60.5 kg BMI 21.955

My Weight 2018-06-28 0600 hr 61.4 kg BMI 22.281

My Weight 2018-07-28 0600 hr 62.2 kg BMI 22.572

My Weight 2018-08-28 0720 hr 61.4 kg BMI 22.281

My Weight 2018-09-28 0805 hr 62.1 kg BMI 22.535

My Weight 2018-10-28 0750 hr 61.3 kg BMI 22.24

My Weight 2018-11-28 1000 hr 61.5 kg BMI 22.318

My Weight 2018-12-28 0650 hr 62.5 kg BMI 22.681

2019

2019-01-28 at 1000 hr 60.9 kg BMI 22.100

2019-02-28 at 0946 hr 61.0 kg BMI 22.136

2019-03-28 at 0700 hr 62.4 kg BMI 22.644

2019-04-28 at 0828 hr 62.9 kg BMI 22.826

2019-05-28 at 0745 hr 62.4 kg BMI 22.826

2019-06-28 at 0650 hr 62.4 kg BMI 22.644

2019-07-28 at 0736 hr 62.8 kg BMI 22.789

2019-08-28 at 0629 hr 62.4 kg BMI 22.644

2019-09-28 at 0644 hr 61.9 kg BMI 22.463

2019-10-28 at 0740 hr 62.5 kg BMI 22.681

2019-11-28 at 0632 hr 62.8 kg BMI 22.789

2019-12-28 at 0726 hr 62.5 kg BMI 22.681

2020

My Weight 2020-01-28 0625 HR  62.6 kg BMI 22.717

My Weight 2020-02-28 0728 HR  62.3 kg BMI 22.608

My Weight 2020-03-28 0649 HR  61.4 kg BMI 22.281

My Weight 2020-04-28 0810 HR  62.0 kg BMI 22.499

My Weight 2020-05-28 0714 HR  62.3 kg BMI 22.608

My Weight 2020-06-28 0757 HR  60.2 kg BMI 21.846

My Weight 2020-07-28 0715 HR  61.6 kg BMI 22.354

My Weight 2020-08-28 0707 HR  61.1 kg BMI 22.173

My Weight 2020-09-28 0609 HR  60.8 kg BMI 22.064

My Weight 2020-10-28 0818 HR  60.7 kg BMI 22.027

My Weight 2020-11-28 0706 HR  60.9 kg BMI 22.100

My Weight 2020-12-28 0631 HR  60.5 kg BMI 21.955

2021

My Weight 2021-01-28 0638 HR  61.3 kg BMI 22.245

My Weight 2021-02-28 0741 HR  61.2 kg BMI 22.209

My Weight 2021-03-28 0659 HR  61.3 kg BMI 22.245

My Weight 2021-04-28 0659 HR  61.1 kg BMI 22.173

My Weight 2021-05-28 0618 HR  61.1 kg BMI 22.173

My Weight 2021-06-28 0604 HR  61.3 kg BMI 22.245

My Weight 2021-07-28 0642 HR  61.2 kg BMI 22.209

My Weight 2021-08-28 0653 HR  61.5 kg BMI 22.318

My Weight 2021-09-28 0618 HR  61.5 kg BMI 22.318

My Weight 2021-10-28 0549 HR  61.0 kg BMI 22.136

My Weight 2021-11-28 0630 HR  61.3 kg BMI 22.245

My Weight 2021-12-28 0528 HR  61.6 kg BMI 22.354

======================================

2022

My Weight 2022-01-28 0910 HR  61.1 kg  BMI 22.173

My Weight 2022-02-28 0642 HR  61.2 kg  BMI 22.209

My Weight 2022-03-28 0649 HR  61.4 kg  BMI 22.281

My Weight 2022-04-28 0649 HR  61.4 kg  BMI 22.281

My Weight 2022-05-28 0549 HR  61.0 kg  BMI 22.136

My Weight 2022-06-28 0549 HR  61.0 kg  BMI 22.136

My Weight 2022-07-28 0700 HR  60.6 kg  BMI 21.991

My Weight 2022-08-28 0640 HR  61.3 kg  BMI 22.245

My Weight 2022-09-28 0738 HR  61.7 kg  BMI 22.390

My Weight 2022-10-28 0708 HR  61.5 kg  BMI 22.318

My Weight 2022-11-28 0706 HR  60.9 kg BMI 22.100

My Weight 2022-12-28 0722 HR  61.1 kg  BMI 22.173

========

2023

My Weight 2023-01-28 0537 HR 60.9 kg BMI 22.100

My Weight 2023-02-28 0515 HR 61.4 kg  BMI 22.281

My Weight 2023-03-28 0606 HR  61.3 kg  BMI 22.245

My Weight 2023-04-28 0738 HR  61.3 kg  BMI 22.245

My Weight 2023-05-28 0721 HR  61.0 kg  BMI 22.136

My Weight 2023-06-28 0641 HR  61.2 kg  BMI 22.209

My Weight 2023-07-28 0700 HR  60.9 kg BMI 22.100

My Weight 2023-08-28 0655 HR  61.3 kg  BMI 22.245

My Weight 2023-09-28 0806 HR  61.2 kg  BMI 22.209

My Weight 2023-10-28 0718 HR  60.8 kg BMI 22.064

=======================================

Note:

My current BMI is within the healthy range of 18.5 to 22.9.

For me, the range of healthy weight is 50.9786 kg (BMI = 18.5) to 63.10324 kg (BMI = 22.9).

People with BMI values of 23 kg/m2 (or 25 kg/m2 according to some sources) and above have been found to be at risk of developing heart disease and diabetes.

To be healthy, I must have a healthy weight.

Be as lean as possible without being underweight, as recommended by World Cancer Prevention Foundation, United Kingdom.

=================================

Note: On 2021-05-28, I removed the unimportant details of old records from My Weight Management Records.

=================================


Ref. WeightManagement



IN FOCUS: Meet the funeral director who quit teaching to comfort the bereavedhttps://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/funeral-director-former-singapore-teacher-death-career-pivot-family-business-3851531?cid=internal_sharetool_androidphone_28102023_cna

IN FOCUS: Meet the funeral director who quit teaching to comfort the bereavedhttps://www.channelnewsasia.com/singapore/funeral-director-former-singapore-teacher-death-career-pivot-family-business-3851531?cid=internal_sharetool_androidphone_28102023_cna


Skip to main content
Logo
Best News Website or Mobile Service
Digital Media Awards Worldwide 2022
  • My Feed
  • Advertisement

    Singapore

    IN FOCUS: Meet the funeral director who quit teaching to comfort the bereaved

    An unplanned career pivot saw a former teacher move from a classroom to a funeral home. In the process, she discovered her calling and grew closer to her father.

    IN FOCUS: Meet the funeral director who quit teaching to comfort the bereaved

    Funeral director Tan Xiaohui (right) and her father Tan Chee Tong preparing for a wake. (Photo: CNA/Raydza Rahman)

    • With people being encouraged to embrace lifelong learning in case they want or need to switch careers, a funeral director shares why she gave up teaching to help the bereaved
    • Going into the industry was a "complete culture shock" and she had to pick up new skills on the job
    • She urged those who are planning to do so to give themself the time to adapt and learn
    28 Oct 2023 06:00AM

    SINGAPORE: Growing up, Ms Tan Xiaohui’s father never talked about what he did for a living, even when he had to work during festive holidays like Chinese New Year.

    “He was always not around,” she said. “I don’t remember being comfortable spending time alone with my father because it used to be awkward.”

    Advertisement

    In 2015, her father got into a traffic accident. He was supposed to be hospitalised, but insisted on being discharged and went back to work immediately.

    It was the June school holidays and Ms Tan, then a secondary school maths teacher, had free time. Her mother asked if she would help her father out for the rest of her break.

    That was how she saw, for the first time, her father’s work as a funeral director. He helped bereaved families in their most vulnerable moments, using his empathy and expertise to bring them comfort and closure.

    The holiday stint ended, and she returned to the classroom. But two years later, Ms Tan, 32, took an unexpected turn in her career when she left teaching to join the funeral business.

    Over the last few years, more people are being encouraged to embrace the idea of lifelong learning, so that if they choose to make a career switch, they are as well-placed as possible to do so.

    Advertisement

    Ms Tan broke a scholarship bond to make that switch, but in the process, found a calling that has stretched her limits, given her a sense of purpose, and brought her and her father closer together.

    BATTLING THE STIGMA

    Ms Tan’s father, Mr Tan Chee Tong, started volunteering at a Buddhist temple in his youth. Now 62, he was working in the import-export trade about 20 years ago when the temple asked him to help organise funerals on a voluntary basis.

    He agreed, and as the years passed, gave over more of his time to death care work. He received payment only for funeral expenses, but otherwise gave freely of his time and energy.

    “At that time I was handling everything by myself, so it became quite tiring. Because many traffic accidents would happen,” he told CNA in Mandarin.

    Even when he decided to take a break from volunteering, families continued to approach him for help with wakes and funerals. There weren’t enough people who could and would do such work.

    Advertisement

    Funeral director Tan Chee Tong speaking to a reporter. (Photo: CNA/Raydza Rahman)

    About 10 years ago, amid tough times in the import-export trade, Mr Tan and his partner decided to wind down their business. He made his own career pivot and established Qing Xing Funeral Services.

    There are people who hold negative stereotypes of the funeral industry, but Mr Tan, a devout Buddhist, said he doesn’t concern himself with them. 

    “Do what you should do, and there’s no need to bother yourself with how people look at you.”

    In her first stint working with her father, Ms Tan felt proud seeing him help families through their grief. But she still avoided mentioning his job to other people, including her friends, because of the stigma she felt around the occupation.

    Then the mother of one of her close friends died. At the wake, which was organised by another funeral director, her friend relayed stories of how lost his family had felt when his mother died, and how they had gone along with the funeral service suggested by the hospital.

    Advertisement

    Ms Tan remembered her father’s calm and efficient way of working with families, how he answered their questions and gave them direction.

    She spotted details in the woman’s wake and funeral that fell below her and her friend’s expectations.

    Back at home, she conferred with her father about these details and realised that he was doing something “really different” for his clients.

    “I remember that deep down it was really sobering because I realised that if I had told my friend earlier, perhaps my dad would have been able to help him,” she said. 

    “That also let me realise that my dad has a standard in the industry that I was not aware of because it’s so hard to compare.”

    It was a turning point in her thinking, said Ms Tan. She decided then to be open with people around her about her father’s job because it could help them.

    NOT JUST A FUNERAL DIRECTOR

    In 2017, Ms Tan broke her government scholarship bond, paying off the balance with her savings. 

    She loved to teach but longed for “more freedom” in the classroom and more time with her students instead of administrative work.

    She quit without telling her parents or lining up a job, and gave tuition while trying to figure out her next step.

    “I was definitely not considering entering the funeral trade … it is completely unplanned.”

    Funeral director Tan Xiaohui (right) and her father Tan Chee Tong standing at a wake they organised. (Photo: CNA/Raydza Rahman)

    Her father was organising so many funerals at the time that he was sleeping only three to four hours a night. Ms Tan’s mother again asked her to help him out, if only to make sure he didn’t doze off while driving.

    It has now been six years since she made the switch from classroom to funeral home.

    When someone dies, funeral directors are the people who usher the bereaved through the process of mourning. 

    The job is heavy on logistics, but more importantly, on emotion.

    “You’re there not just as a funeral director, you’re also there to calm them down, to provide them support,” said Ms Tan.

    Sometimes, she will receive calls from people worried about funeral details even before their loved ones have died.

    When that happens, she tells them to seize the remaining time and concentrate on spending it together – administrative matters can wait.

    Her journey with the family usually starts when she goes to the mortuary to collect the body.

    A typical Singaporean Chinese wake lasts three or five days. Before that, the body must be sent for embalming, permits need to be obtained for the wake, slots need to be booked for cremation and interment of ashes, and the wake and funeral need to be organised.

    A funeral director does all that, and consults the family on religious needs and other preferences. Did they or the deceased want a maximalist or minimalist funeral? How should the body be made up and dressed? How do they want to memorialise their loved one?

    Funeral director Tan Xiaohui (left) and her father Tan Chee Tong during an ash-scattering ceremony at the Garden of Peace in Choa Chu Kang Cemetary. (Photo: CNA/Davina Tham)

    After the body is cremated, she accompanies the family to the niche where the ashes will be kept, or to the garden or sea where they will be scattered, and guides them on how to pay their respects.

    For Ms Tan, a good funeral is when the family can grieve but also experience healing and catharsis. “It’s an expression of love, and most of the time, it’s also their time to express their regrets,” she said.

    COMPLETE CULTURE SHOCK

    Ms Tan describes her career pivot as a “complete culture shock”. One of her strongest early impressions is that her funeral crew often communicated by shouting at each other.

    The contrast between a school environment “where students are just sitting there quietly listening to you” and an industry “where it’s normal for the staff to raise their voice” was jarring, and pointed to the more physical and informal nature of her work.

    Also shocking was finding out that her father’s record-keeping was done entirely with pen and paper. “When I first joined, everything was a mess,” she recalled.

    Ms Tan – who graduated with a bachelor’s degree in education – noted that many small business owners share the same headaches as her.

    She had to pick up skills on the job, such as accounting, customer relations, human resources, procurement and inventory.

    There are no formal qualifications for funeral directors in Singapore. But short courses – such as a three-day programme at the Institute of Technical Education – offer a glimpse into the work, including the psychology of grieving and emotional management.

    It wasn’t just about picking up new skills – one major challenge was the potential conflict with her personal time.

    As a teacher, she had “protected time” away from work during the school holidays. But working in death care meant being on call 24/7 and working weekends, public holidays, late nights and early mornings.

    “I feel that there is no greater event in a person’s life than a death,” she said. “This takes precedence over everything else. When someone calls me, I should be there – first time (they call) – and I should be there throughout.”

    Working in a small family business also means there is no career ladder to climb. Ms Tan declined to reveal her income, but said the greatest difference from teaching is not the amount of money she makes, but its regularity.

    “It was much easier as a teacher. I just do my job and then the money comes in,” she said. As a small business owner, there needs to be enough work to take care of her staff and overheads.

    “There are so many things that you have to invest back into the business, like better equipment, and you have to gauge for yourself the amount to invest back in, or how much to pay yourself – in fact, you pay yourself last.”

    “YOU’RE NOT GOING TO LAST LONG”

    To others looking at Ms Tan’s life and choices, her unconventional career pivot has not always been understandable. Acquaintances and former colleagues reacted with disbelief and some even with pity.

    “You would do well (in teaching), so why do you want to change to a job that has no fixed working hours and has a lot of emotional baggage?” she said, recalling the comments she would hear.

    The high emotion involved in guiding families through a funeral can take a toll, and she has only recently started carving out an hour each day to process what she goes through on the job.

    Well-meaning acquaintances expected Ms Tan to go into private education after she left teaching, and suggested career alternatives after she told them what she had been doing.

    Even her own funeral crew and clients felt this way in the beginning. “They would say, ‘why are you doing this? There are so many better options for you’,” she recalled.

    “I realised that initially the families just think that I’m doing this because I probably failed at my exams, I probably didn’t go to (university).”

    She laughed while recalling how a client, after learning that she used to be a maths teacher, asked her to help his son with some maths homework at a wake.

    Ms Tan has met many people who consider her overqualified for death care.

    The funeral industry is also one where “ironically, the more educated you are, the more people feel that you are not going to last long”, because they tend to think “it’s a last resort” for graduates, she said.

    These words affected her, especially at the start.

    “Of course, my mind will tell me, why didn’t you just stick to being a teacher? You’re doing well, so why put yourself through this?

    “After a few years in the industry, I feel that actually there is no overqualification in handling death,” she said.

    “I only hear such comments from people who have not experienced loss in their family before. Because I have a flipside of people who are telling me that it’s a very noble job, and I know how hard it can get.”

    Flowers at the Garden of Peace in Choa Chu Kang Cemetery. (File photo: CNA/Davina Tham)

    The naysayers did help in one way – strengthening her resolve to stick to her choice.

    “Since young I’ve always been very open to challenges. And the more someone tells me that you cannot do this, I will do it,” she said.

    Ms Tan has found that doing the work is the best way to change people’s preconceptions.

    “I think what really overturned this discrimination is when you show them that you are capable of handling the dead bodies as well, and you are capable of doing what they feel that you cannot do,” she said.

    “Sometimes the deceased can be in a state of decomposition already, so they feel like you cannot handle the sight of it, or you cannot handle the stench of it. When you are able to do it, it slowly changes their perspective.”

    Whether you have a university degree does not matter, she said.

    “In this industry, for you to last, there are only two things – you must have a heart of empathy, and you (must) really genuinely want to serve the family.

    “Without these two qualities, it’s not possible for you to last through the sleepless nights and all those mental challenges that you face.”

    DO NOT GIVE IN TO SELF-DOUBT

    Ms Tan was apprehensive about changing jobs at first because she enjoyed parts of being a teacher. Becoming a funeral director also strayed from the career milestones she used to imagine herself hitting by a certain age.

    But seeing how death impacts everyone, regardless of their achievements in life, and how her work helped families to move forward, convinced her of the new path she had chosen.

    Funeral director Tan Xiaohui (left) and her father Tan Chee Tong preparing for a wake. (Photo: CNA/Raydza Rahman)

    She is not the only one changing jobs over the last few years.

    In 2022, the proportion of workers in Singapore who changed jobs in the past two years rose to 17 per cent – the highest in six years. While the incidence of job-switching rose across all age groups, it was highest among workers aged below 30.

    According to the Manpower Ministry’s annual labour force report, such younger workers are more likely to change jobs as they "readily explore different career options" to gain more experience.

    Last month, Deputy Prime Minister Lawrence Wong urged workers to stay relevant and competitive in their skills, amid a challenging environment marked by external uncertainties and domestic constraints.

    The government’s spending on its SkillsFuture programme has almost doubled to nearly S$1 billion (US$729 million) this year, but it “can and will do more” to invest in lifelong learning and reskilling, he added.

    Ms Tan, who was under 30 at the time of her own pivot, acknowledged that a career change can become scarier with age, as older people may have more responsibilities.

    She pointed out the importance of considering the pros and cons of one’s current job so as to avoid making an impulsive decision.

    After making the switch, “give yourself a timeframe to adapt, prepare to learn, unlearn and relearn, and then give it your best shot”, she said.

    “What helped me was to not think about ‘if you fail, it is okay’. Instead at each roadblock, I think about how to overcome it and not give in to self-doubt.”

    There will always be people who do not support the move, but having self-belief is critical, she added.

    “In the process of a new career you may or will fall hard, and that is okay. I give myself five minutes to cry about it then I pick myself up and try again because that is how growth happens.”

    For her, the challenge is bringing new blood into the industry. Few people are willing to make the change that Ms Tan did.

    Ms Tan and her father are the only members of her family involved in Qing Xing, and they work with four other workers.

    For two years, they have been trying with no success to hire one more staff member – even for roles that do not involve working with bodies, such as office work and liaising with clients.

    When she has managed to get a new recruit through the door, there have been times when that person’s family members would call her to express reservations, and she would have no choice but to let the potential hire go.

    The labour crunch applies across the industry. It is hard enough getting Singaporeans into the service industry, let alone the funeral sector, said Mr Hoo Hung Chye, executive director of the Association of Funeral Directors.

    The manpower quota also means there needs to be a core of local workers before funeral firms can hire foreigners, he said.

    The National Environment Agency (NEA) said last year there are at least 800 vacancies to be filled in the funeral industry over the next few years.

    The shortfall in workers can be felt in the way the number of deaths is rising “but we don’t see a huge in-tandem growth of new blood coming into our industry”, leading to overwork, said Mr Hoo. Deaths in Singapore rose 10.7 per cent to almost 27,000 last year.

    The problem is that “nobody really aspires to a career in the funeral industry”, he told CNA.

    “In terms of raising the public perception, the negativity or some will call it ‘pantang’-ness of our industry, then that would really help,” he said, using the Malay word for taboo or superstition. “So they will see that this is a real profession that needs to be respected.”

    While there is a gap in the market to fill, Mr Hoo, a funeral director who is the founder of Singapore Funeral Services, also cautioned against the idea of making a quick buck and profiting from the death care industry.

    At the end of the day, there is “a demand on the service providers to do their job diligently and ethically, because it’s really a family we’re serving”, he stressed.

    “YOU PASSED”

    Having heard countless eulogies in her line of work, Ms Tan can easily name the top regrets of the living: Not being in time to apologise, and not spending enough time with the person who has died.

    This hit home in 2018 when she bought her father surprise plane tickets to Jakarta to see his mother. Ms Tan’s father had told her that if he were to die suddenly, his top regret would be not spending enough time with her grandmother.

    “When my dad told me this, I immediately wanted to solve it,” said Ms Tan. “It just hit me that even though we are in this industry, have we taken time out to reflect on our own regrets?

    After her father left for Indonesia, she took on the business herself, but with the burgeoning workload, her father returned halfway through the trip.

    “But I never regretted that decision, because that was also the last time my father saw my grandmother alive before she abruptly passed in 2019.”

    After coming back from her grandmother’s funeral, her father thanked her for “jumping the gun” and “being impulsive”, she said.

    It also changed their working relationship. Ms Tan’s learning curve went up “vertically” when her father first went away, and she realised how much he had been sheltering her from the demands of their work.

    The next time her father left Singapore for her grandmother’s funeral, Ms Tan was prepared to hold the fort alone for four days. When her father returned, he went to get feedback from the families.

    The verdict was relayed through Ms Tan’s mother, who told her: “You passed.”

    Source: CNA/dv(mi)